I think therapy would really help you: either try your GP or find an accredited local therapist through the College of Sexual and Relationship Therapists site (cosrt
My husband and I are in our mid-50s and have been together for 30 years. I cannot remember the last time we had sex – it was at least four years ago. The last few times, he found it difficult and lost his erection. I don’t know why, and I think I felt that maybe it was me somehow. The problem is that we have no intimacy at all. He has never been terribly demonstrative physically, and I wonder if this is because his parents never were, but now we never touch, never hold hands, never cuddle.
Occasionally, I have tried, but it is very obvious that he doesn’t want me near him – he becomes stiff and awkward until I let go. At the moment, every conversation we have turns into an argument and, at times, it seems better not to talk at all. Hence the idea of even starting to become close again is not something I feel I want to do. I see other couples our age holding hands and being affectionate – even my parents, who are now 80.
I feel lonely. Our two children will soon both be gone. I often think about leaving him, but the reality is very difficult to think about. We have very little pension between us and our future depends on selling up and possibly buying somewhere smaller. If I were to leave him, we would both struggle for money, and I would certainly have no option of retiring from my job, which I find very stressful. Lire la suite